08.14.07
Drunk Woman: NO COLDPLAY KARAOKE! POW!
(from antiMUSIC) It’s things like this that restore my faith in the future of good music – a 21-yr old vigilante young woman took the law into her own hands as some drunk, heartless bastard barraged the unexpecting crowd with Coldplay’s breakaway smashout falsetto-pitched hit “Yellow” – you remember, the song that annoyed the shit out of everybody before you knew that Coldplay was “the next big thing” and that the lead singer was married to Gwyneth Paltrow. The woman, upon hearing the opening notes of the shameless track, yelled something about how she couldn’t stand that song and promptly got up and clocked the dude in the face. Since the man was singing “Yellow”, he probably cried and said “I came along! I wrote a song for you!” The woman got dragged out before she punched a bar employee in the face twice (presumably for allowing the dastardly customer to pelt the audience with such rubbish). As you can imagine, she was arrested. But if I had some kind of medal to award her, I totally would. She didn’t mean any harm, guys. She was performing some kind of Pavlovian experiment in reverse, and that’s admirable.
08.13.07
Michael Schenker Likely in Rehab After Onstage Implosion
I must admit first and foremost that before today I had not heard of Michael Schenker. But this story really, really makes me feel bad…
I checked antiMUSIC today and saw that there was a headline titled “Schenker Rehab Intervention”. Most of us have a natural, morbid fascination with the shit others get themselves into, which explains the reason you say “Oh ANOTHER Pete Doherty story oh my god when is he gonna [insert phrase for 'make positive progress' such as 'get a life', 'grow up', 'die', etc]“. I am no different – I suffer the same curiosity. So I checked out the story to see who had fucked up this time. antiMUSIC reported that the ex-UFO and Scorpions member was performing awfully at an August 3 appearance midway through the Michael Schenker Group’s tour when his band appeared to huddle around and confront him onstage before thanking the crowd and cutting the set quite abruptly. The group’s drummer Bodo Schopf posted on his website that “a man who plays from his heart was really hurt in his heart”, but that he is “now in good hands”, presumably rehab, “where he gets a really good treatment”. The tour is obviously off for the band, but I wonder why the man wasn’t perhaps approached earlier about the issue, as fan/flamer comments on a Blabbermouth post about the show indicate that the problem has been long-running.
I hope that, unlike Lindsnort Lohan, this can be a new start for the man. It really is painful to hear him attempt such a weak solo after watching numerous other YouTube videos of him shredding like a maniac. I wish him well.
07.26.07
John Mayer: Teabag Underage Drinking!
This is hilarious. I’ll just let the article speak for itself, then John Mayer’s blog post, reprinted below.
“First, to the 46 people accused of underage drinking; what were you thinking? You have your whole life to engage in underage drinking. What’s the hurry? I didn’t start underage drinking until I was 26. Underage drinking is not an function of age, but of style. And you kids are way too young to truly appreciate the nuances of true underage drinking.
“Though the names of the arrested were not released to the public, I was able to obtain them by way of my well-placed source in the Hershey police department. Upon first glance, I find it interesting that of the 63 arrested, 55 were named Kyle.
“In looking to the future, I hope that this will serve as a wake-up call to young fans who may be thinking about engaging in illegal activity at one of my concerts. If I happen to be walking backstage and I see any of you young men passed out drunk on a stretcher, make no mistake about it, you will come-to in front of your disappointed parents with a face full of Sharpie and the sneaking suspicion that you’ve been teabagged by one of Time magazine’s 100 most influential people of 2007.”
